Thursday, 22 May 2014


quote [ Chalk one up for the first two bulls at Spain's top annual bullfighting festival. ]

For the first time in 35 years the Bulls won injuring 3 Matadors forcing a premature end to the festivities!

Now that should be the headline.

[SFW] [humor] [+10 Good]
[by De_Wr0ng@6:07pmGMT]


cb361 said @ 6:23pm GMT on 22nd May [Score:3 Funny]

A young man stopped at a local restaurant after a day of roaming around in Mexico.

While sipping his tequila, he noticed a sizzling, scrumptious-looking platter being served at the next table.

It looked good. It smelled good.

He asked the waiter, "What is that you just served?"

The waiter replied, "Ah senor, you have excellent taste! Those are bull's testicles from the bull fight this morning. A delicacy!"

The visitor, though momentarily daunted, said, "What the heck, I'm on holiday down here! Bring me an order!"

The waiter replied, "I am so sorry senor. There is only one serving per day because there is only one bull fight each morning. If you come early tomorrow and place your order, we will be sure to save you this delicacy!"

The next morning, the man returned, placed his order, and then that evening was served the one and only special delicacy of the day.

After a few bites, and inspecting the contents of his platter, he called to the waiter and said, "These are delicious, but they are much, much smaller than the ones I saw you serve yesterday!"

The waiter shrugged his shoulders and replied, "Si, Senor. Sometimes the bull wins."
yogi said @ 8:21am GMT on 25th May [Score:3 Interesting]
I took bullfighting lessons a year ago. I'd been wanting to all my life, ever since I was ten years old. I loved it.

After 4 days spent learning how to use the capote (the big yellow and pink cape) and the muleta (the red cape--it doesn't matter the color, the bulls chase movement and are color-blind) I stepped into a ring in Mexico and stepped slowly up to a small cow. She lowered her head and ran right by me, following the movement of the cape that I had shaken in her face. She chased the cape as I led her past me, time and again.

Even a cow waist-high will act just like a bull in a ring. And a cow waist-high can inflict some damage--break legs, stomp on your foot.

Their psychology is that they've been out in the pasture, amongst their fellow animals, and this is the first time they are separated from their herd. They are nervous and scared, and will charge all the way across the ring to get to the slightest movement.

Eventually they tire out, and so the jurisdiction--the area they are willing to cover to get to something moving--comes closer to their body. That's when the artful capework comes in. Another way to think about it is that you are leading a cat with a string--same principle.

I did not, and I don't know if I could, kill a bull, even if it's just a different way of bringing meat to market.

I do know it's very exciting to be alone in the ring with just a piece of cloth to defend myself.
Ankylosaur said @ 6:12pm GMT on 22nd May [Score:1 Underrated]
Do people show up at bullfights and root for the bull? Like wearing hats with bullhorns and bulls #1 foam hands and matching body paint that spells out B-U-L-L and chants like "gore the matador!"? If not, that should be a thing.
cb361 said @ 6:29pm GMT on 22nd May
I think it's intended as a display of machismo, to be admired by the crowd, rather than a straight-up contest between man and bull. The bull isn't a participant, it's just a prop.

Which makes it all the more gratifying when one of the strutting dandies gets gored. They were asking for it, dressed like that. The hussies.
Bob Denver said @ 12:57am GMT on 23rd May
It should be a thing. I watched my first and only bullfight in Mexico City and had a hard time controlling my tears (I'm normally not a weepy guy). I was rooting for the bull.

One thing, if the bull has fought really valiantly, the matador can spare that animal who then gets fixed up by the vet and goes on to sire more fighting bulls. And Catalunya in Spain has (at last count) banned bullfighting and closed the rings in Barcelona and other towns.

Finally, a lot of famous bullfighters came from the town of Ronda. There are bronze statues of all of them. These statues all have MASSIVE genital bulges which, for some reason are much shinier than the rest of the statue.

Fuck bloodsports in the eye with a lime-covered dildo.
Resurrected Morris said @ 4:12pm GMT on 23rd May
snowfox said @ 5:17pm GMT on 23rd May
This is so depressing. I'd almost forgotten people think it's entertaining to torture and slaughter animals.
arrowhen said @ 6:08pm GMT on 23rd May
Isn't "sport" hunting a big deal in Texas?
mechavolt said @ 7:03pm GMT on 23rd May [Score:1 Underrated]
I'm not a fan of sport hunting, either. But bull fighting is in an entirely different class of cruelty.
arrowhen said @ 8:14pm GMT on 23rd May
Oh I don't disagree with that at all. I just mentioned it because here in Louisiana the prevalence of hunting culture is a pretty much constant reminder that humans like to kill animals for fun.
arrowhen said @ 8:22pm GMT on 23rd May
(oops, hit post too early)

Given that Texas doesn't seem THAT different from here (source: my Dad and like 40 uncles and cousins and shit were from Texas), I imagine myself similarly reminded there.
snowfox said @ 6:34am GMT on 24th May
The part I am in isn't like Louisiana as far as I know, and my friends are mostly nerds like me. Going outside in Texas is for people who want skin cancer.

Hunting and bullfighting are quite different. Bullfighting is purely about sport and requires abuse of the animal to make it fight, resulting in a slow death. Hunting, however, can be necessary. Since there are few natural predators remaining, humans have to kill the deer or they become too populous and outstrip their own food supply. Feral pigs are an invasive, introduced species that also have to be killed (so there is no bag limit or season).

Moreover, if you eat the animal you kill, it's no worse than buying meat at a grocery store. Sure, both make you a monster, but it's so hard not to be that I just accepted my monsterdom years ago.

Keep making cracks about Texas though. Yee haw.
arrowhen said @ 6:44pm GMT on 24th May [Score:1 Funny]
Most of my uncles on the Texas side of my family were hunting guides at some point, so I've heard all the arguments (and probably tasted just about every ungulate native to North America!) I agree that hunting can be necessary. We have feral pig problems around here, too -- apparently ours are giving STDs to cows. (Yes, cows.) And I agree that hunting for meat is no worse than buying it; hell, it's probably better. But whether it's good or bad, useful or not, part of sport hunting is killing animals for fun.

Also, please show me the "crack" I made about Texas.
snowfox said @ 7:40pm GMT on 24th May
+1 funny for pig-cow STDs. rofl
arrowhen said @ 7:46pm GMT on 24th May [Score:1 WTF]
snowfox said @ 7:51pm GMT on 24th May
Just more evidence that pigs are a lot like us... No wait, we fuck goats. Nevermind.
mechanical contrivance said @ 3:38am GMT on 25th May
Does the cow even notice the pig behind it?
Resurrected Morris said @ 8:22pm GMT on 23rd May
tasty fun
ComposerNate said @ 7:39am GMT on 26th May
Most land mammals are slaughtered for human pleasure.
ComposerNate said @ 7:54am GMT on 26th May
Most large land mammals...

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