The worst thing that happens to me when I eat way too much black licorice is that I have green shits for a few days.

You're obviously not eating enough.

Death by unga-bunga, as far as I'm concerned.

Licorice truly is the worst candy.

The fact that people will eat so much of it that it kills them is a pretty good counter-argument.

The Dutch, being unrestrained liquorice eaters, added salt to it to stop overconsumption and it still didn't work. So they combined hydrochloric acid and ammonia to make "salmiak" and added that too.

These loathsome looking hell-droppings are called salmiak rondos:

They are a shell of salted liquorice surrounding a solid ball of brown vile-smelling acid. They are the doomsday devices of candy, and I love 'em - but only one at a time, unlike the poor chap in the link. Eating much more would either dissolve your tongue or kill you by hypertension long before the glycyrrhizic acid could kick in.

My wife is from the Netherlands and loves the double salt licorice, although she eats it in moderation. She brought a bag to our Dutch display at one of our daughter's culture nights when she was in elementary school here in Oklahoma. The organizers eventually just brought a garbage can to our display as people were spitting it out shortly after putting it in their mouths.

Haha, she totally did it hoping for that reaction. Bet she gave a big handful to the most annoying little shit in your daughter's class, or the biggest douchebag from the PTA.

The thing is, she is totally not that kind of person. She just has a way of trolling people without even realizing it. When she enrolled our daughter in school the first year one of the forms she filled out asked if we spoke a) more than 50% percent English, or b) less than 50% English, at home. Rather than check one of the boxes she wrote in 50%, since she speaks only Dutch to the kids and I only speak English. The school called and I listen to her talk to this girl for over 30 minutes, basically refusing to pick one of the options. When she got off the phone I laughed and told her that it was great how she pointed out their flawed form. She just looks and me and says, what do you mean? I actually felt sorry for the poor girl who was probably just inputting the info into the system.

What a great character! I admire the Dutch style of pragmatism that insists on stating things as they are regardless of what boxes people want to put them into.

Maybe that's what Dutch liquorice is all about? The sweetness needs to be leavened with the salt of sincerity.

So you motivated me to look this up. They no shit put ammonia chloride in their licorice. This salt, when mixed with saliva, breaks apart into fucking ammonia. These crazy fuckers are actually eating god damn ammonia and smiling while doing it.

Apparently the EU tried to limit the amount of salmiak in foodstuffs, and lost the battle when it came to licorice and ice cream. Crazy ass shit.

Even crazier, people eat the salmiak by itself, without even coating it in liquorice as an excuse. The most potent salmiak bombs are these ones. The design of these really gives the game away:


They're called Doodskopjes. Dead Heads. A pile of these on your desk looks like a Cambodian war crimes atrocity.

Props for your recent image-heavy comments

Salmiak, or 'salmiakki' as it's called around these parts, is a big hit in Finland too! I don't really care much for candy, but I LOVE me some salmiakki.

I'm pretty sure the rule about psychopaths preferring black coffee because it matches their personality also applies to licorice.