Monday, 16 March 2020

The Earliest Depiction of Jesus Was a Mocking Tribute to Christianity

quote [ In the Palatine museum in Rome there is a collection of ancient graffiti etched on slabs of marble and limestone that once defaced the walls of palaces and public buildings across the Roman Empire. Among these is one that historians call “Alexamenos graffito” ]

Jesus rolled his eyes when his dad made Jesus jokes
[SFW] [humor] [+3]
[by ScoobySnacks@5:02amGMT]


hellboy said @ 8:11am GMT on 16th Mar
Q: Why did Jesus die on the cross?

A: He forgot his safeword.

Q: What's the difference between Jesus and a picture of Jesus?

A: Only takes one nail to hang the picture.
hellboy said @ 8:13am GMT on 16th Mar [Score:1 Funny]
I just discovered this one:

Wilson runs a nail factory and decides his business needs a bit of advertising. He has a chat with a friend who works in marketing and he offers to make a TV ad for Wilson's Nails.

"Give me a week," says the friend, "and I'll be back with a tape."

A week goes by and the marketing executive comes to see Wilson. He puts a cassette in the video and presses play. A Roman soldier is busy nailing Jesus to the cross. He turns to face the camera and says with a grin "Use Wilson's Nails, they'll hold anything."

Wilson goes mad shouting: "What is the matter with you? They'll never show that on TV. Give it another try, but no more Romans crucifying Jesus!"

Another week goes by and the marketing man comes back to see Wilson with another tape. He puts it in the machine and hits play. This time the camera pans out from a Roman standing with his arms folded to show Jesus on the cross. The Roman looks up at him and says 'Wilson's Nails, they'll hold anything'.

Wilson is beside himself. "You don't understand: I don't want anything with Jesus on the cross! Now listen, I'll give you one last chance. Come back in a week with an advertisement that I can broadcast."

A week passes and Wilson waits impatiently. The marketing executive arrives and puts on the new video. A naked man with long hair, gasping for breath, is running across a field. About a dozen Roman soldiers come over the hill, hot on his trail. One of them turns to camera and says 'If only we had used Wilson's Nails!'
cb361’s girlfriend said @ 7:06pm GMT on 17th Mar [Score:1 Insightful]
Well, it is Easter.
Hugh E. said @ 11:01am GMT on 16th Mar
Shouldn't that be, Jesus rolled his eyes when his dad made God jokes?
gendo666 said @ 12:01am GMT on 17th Mar
There's a really good book on this that covers early Christianity and also the merging of Christmas as Christ's birth and the Festivals that had a "Lord of Missrule."

It's called "Feast of Fools" by Harvey Cox.
It's from 1969 and there have been much more resent books on the subject as well.
Been about 10 years since I read it though.

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